Surviving

I think that, like a lot of others, I found it very difficult to know what to say when Covid 19 hit China and then spread around the world, and to Australia, as we watched the numbers of cases and deaths grow and grow. On reflection, I realise that I actually responded in a number of ways that were almost linear at first.

Shock and disbelief

This was my initial response, and came along with fear and immobility (and speechlessness), and I know that this is how I have responded to previous unexpected crises in my life. I also felt a sense of relief when Governments (both State and Federal) began to implement isolation measures, including border closures, social distancing and other closures, that rapidly increased in severity.

Taking inventory and beginning to problem solve

Next came a time to take stock:

• of food and hygiene supplies (as some of these became difficult to obtain, and bare shelves in certain sections of the supermarkets confronted all of us)
• of sewing and craft supplies (that might become difficult to find in the future, and of what I already have), so I can keep myself occupied (although I still find that lack of motivation is a challenge for me)
• of ways to shop safely in the supermarket and other places
• of skills I have, and things I have learnt, that will help me at this time (e.g. making soap, growing vegetables)

I am reminded that our brains are naturally titled to the negative (and we are being given an overdose of negatives right now), so then problem solving becomes vitally important to tilt our brains to the positive. I try to look at what I can't do now, and then ask myself what I can do instead.

Finding new ways to do things/ being creative/ taking action

Technology has became a major communication tool, as it has for many people, and my husband and I have made a point of reaching out to at least one person by either phone or email each day. I have found that it is better for my anxiety to look and reach out, instead of looking inwards. Technology is also a major source of information for me, whether it be about keeping up to date with the progress of the Virus, or finding creative solutions to issues that arise. We don't watch the news on TV and limit our updates to a few bulletins on ABC radio and our I-phones, the NSW Health site and Norman Swan's Coronacast, as there is too much exaggerated and misleading information out there.

I have also found ways to connect with the community and with young grandchildren (which I will outline in separate posts).

Then there have been ways of finding substitutes for difficult to obtain food items.

Feelings of grief and loss

For some reason, Easter really stirred these up for me, and I realised the time will come when we will need to grieve for all the losses this major lifestyle change and upside-down-turning of the world have brought us. I particularly grieve for not being able to visit my grandchildren (two are across a closed state border and the other two are long journeys away at a time when travel is not permitted). However, I acknowledge that the time to grieve is not whilst we are in survival mode (apart from the tears we are allowed to shed from time to time).

Do we dare to hope?

It is hard to trust the signs of progress in Australia, especially as there are other countries still living in a world of nightmares. I have to ask myself if it is really possible that we can get off so lightly by comparison, and wonder if there is worse to come, but I think this is shock and disbelief talking again. 

Then I need to be reminded of things to be grateful for and of the strategies we have put into place to stay safe.  I know that I need to not be so caught up in the concerns that I miss the good things in life. After two years of drought and looking at bare paddocks, this year we have had regular falls of rain and our surroundings are green again, removing a major worry. And I have taken note of acts of kindness that others are providing to people around them. These have inspired me to take action too.

Remember: For God has not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind. 2 Timothy 1:7